After 33 1/2 years together, Ticketmaster and I are getting divorced. When any long term relationship ends, the break up is full of lots of emotions - hurt, anger, disappointment. And this break up is no different.
Our relationship started out great! But, now that I'm older and wiser, I know that trying to continue to make this relationship work is just not worth it anymore. The break up won't be easy, but staying together would be even harder.
To understand the reasons for our divorce, you have to understand the whole history of our relationship. So come with me as I travel down memory lane, revisit the good and bad times, and share what ultimately led to the end!
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How We Met
Ticketmaster and I met on August 30, 1989. Our first date was at the Palace of Auburn Hills just outside of Detroit. We were set up by two mutual friends - my favorite band (The Cure) and (ironically) my boyfriend and now husband (Kevin).
Our first date was magical. Kevin had managed to get us amazing seats and The Cure put on a fantastic show. It was everything I ever dreamed of, and I was immediately hooked!
The Engagement
After that first date, I knew Ticketmaster was the one for me. But, I was busy going to college and then law school. I didn't have a lot of money to spend on a lavish wedding, so we took the relationship slow.
For the most part, I lived in Toledo and Ticketmaster lived in Detroit, so it was hard to see each other as often as we wanted. But, we did what we could on a budget, and made the times we had together as amazing as possible. We spent time together with friends like U2, Prince and of course the band that brought us together - The Cure.
Because our relationship was new, when we did spend time together, we did it in person. Sometimes it was at an official Ticketmaster Outlet, where I'd stand in line for a chance to be together. Other times, I'd hit redial over and over again on our old rotary phone, just for the chance to talk to a real person to set up our date.
The Wedding and Honeymoon
By the end of 1998, I was ready to take the next step and get married. This meant moving to Philadelphia, where I could be with Ticketmaster all the time in lots of different venues! We could even easily take day trips together to places like New York City.
On December 26, 1998 I boarded a plane to Philadelphia to start our new life together. At first, the honeymoon was great. The world was our oyster! We had so many new venues to explore together. And so many new artists to experience.
After a while, we settled into a routine that a lot of married couples settle into. We no longer spoke to each other on the phone or saw each other in person to plan our dates. But the new online system we used to plan things actually worked really well, and saved us both a lot of time in our busy lives.
Someone's Cheating
I'll admit it. I'm the one that started cheating first. I was looking for more in my life, so I started writing this blog. That led to me meeting new people. Independent venues and independent artists who were interested in me and keeping me happy. They weren't just interested in how much money I made, and whether I would wine and dine them.
I realized there were people out there that were willing to work hard to keep me happy, and not take me for granted. Who were willing to give me a more intimate experience.
Of course, Ticketmaster wasn't completely innocent either. They started seeing other people with names like "dynamic pricing", "platinum", and "verified resale". While I couldn't quite pin down who these other people were, how they worked, and why they randomly appeared in our life, I knew they were set on destroying our relationship.
The Separation
In March of 2020, Ticketmaster and I separated. It wasn't a voluntary separation, but one forced by a global pandemic. With each canceled date, my heart broke into more and more pieces. It was then that I realized how much of a love-hate relationship we were in with each other. I hated Ticketmaster, but I felt like I couldn't live without them. All I wanted was to see them again, no matter the cost.
As time wore on during the separation, it became a little easier. Some of our mutual friends knew how much I was hurting, and did their best to make it easier. Justin Furstenfeld of Blue October appeared on my laptop every Tuesday night for weeks, to sing me some songs and talk about life in general. Adam Weiner of Low Cut Connie made me laugh every week from his apartment in South Philly.
By December of 2020, I made the decision to make a change. I temporarily moved away from the home we had made together in Philadelphia, to spend some time at the beach in South Carolina. It was there that I learned that life could be slower and still be ok. I learned that every weekend didn't need to be spent with Ticketmaster for me to still be content. In fact, I learned I could go without Ticketmaster and not only survive, but thrive!
Should We Get Back Together?
As with any long term relationship, you can't just throw it away without giving it one more try. The world started to get back to "normal", and Ticketmaster called me back to give it another try.
At first, it seemed to be working ok. We had lots of dates that were planned before the pandemic that needed to be re-scheduled, so I didn't feel I was being taken advantage of at first. I wasn't fighting with bots and other fans for Ticketmaster's attention.
Unfortunately, that didn't last. I realized that if I stayed in Philadelphia with Ticketmaster, not only were things going to just go back to the way they were, but they were likely going to get worse. And they did get worse. All of the bad actors that were in Ticketmaster's life before - "dynamic pricing", "platinum", "verified resale", "bots" - were back with a vengeance. We tried working it out with our therapist - "verified fan" - but they couldn't help either.
The Divorce
While divorce is always painful, sometimes it's the best option. I wish I could say that my divorce with Ticketmaster has been amicable, but it's not. I feel angry, hurt, frustrated and sad all at once. I used to get so much joy out of our dates, and now I just feel bitter.
I've moved to South Carolina permanently, where I can slow down and enjoy life a little more. I've discovered some new friends, and we have dates in little local venues where we can really get to know each other. I've also discovered that I'd rather spend my time, money and energy on things other than Ticketmaster. Things like traveling to new places, exploring new restaurants, or just spending time at the beach.
Ticketmaster has moved on as well. They are now dating corporate sponsors and wealthy individuals that don't mind throwing money at them to keep them happy. Unfortunately, they are also still continuing to take advantage of people like me before I saw the light. People who love their mutual friends so much, that they'll do anything and pay anything to be together. People who just want to meet their heroes once, and know Ticketmaster is the only one that can bring them together. People who are willing to pay anything for a couple of hours of bliss with Ticketmaster. I feel for those people. I was one of them too once.
As with any divorce, we still need to work out some details. There will still be times we get together. We have kids together - The Cure, Coldplay, Dave Matthews Band and others - so we both are going to have to play nice together from time to time for their sake. But the kids also know that I can't continue to be in a toxic relationship. So the times we are all together will be fewer and farther between.
Maybe someday Ticketmaster will change their ways. Maybe someday our kids will gain the courage to tell them that they need to start treating people in their lives better. Maybe Ticketmaster will do enough people wrong, that they all start leaving them and Ticketmaster is left with nothing. The optimist in me hopes that will happen, but the realist in me doesn't think it will.
So, after hundreds, if not thousands, of dates and over 33 years together, I'm officially calling it quits with Ticketmaster. And while it's not the outcome I wanted and it hurts, I know it's the right thing to do in the long run. Peace out!
Are you breaking up with Ticketmaster too? Let us know! Comment below or e-mail me at tips2livebywriter@gmail.com.
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